TRANSCRIPT

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Episode #29 - Finding the Right Financial Advisor: Guidance for Your Unique Financial Journey

Introduction

Eric Blake: Welcome to another episode of the Simply Retirement Podcast. I am your host Eric Blake. During the day, I am a practicing retirement planner and certified financial planner with almost 25 years of experience. I am the founder of Blake Wealth Management, where we focus on retirement planning for women over 55. On this show, we discuss issues and topics that women face on their retirement journey. So whether you're single, widowed, divorced, or simply ready to take control of your financial future, this is the show for you.

If you want to learn more, ask a question, suggest a topic for the show, or even just join our weekly Simply Retirement newsletter, you can go to www.thesimplyretirementpodcast.com. Now, on today's episode, I hope it's a special episode. I really hope it's going to bring some value to our audience. As, of course, you probably expect, I'm biased in my belief that most people should be working with a financial advisor or financial planner or at least have access to financial advice depending on your financial situation.

Finding the Right Financial Advisor

But I'm also a big believer that you need to find the right financial advisor for you. I like to say that everyone needs a financial advisor, but you don't need every financial advisor. That means you need to work with an advisor that understands your issues, unique concerns, and questions but, most importantly, has helped others just like you answer the questions that you have and help them deal with the same challenges that you have. I do not believe a financial advisor can specialize in everybody. The majority of our clients are in or very near retirement.

They may have gone through a divorce or been widowed. We help women build a retirement strategy that ideally provides them dignity and independence throughout retirement. I know Social Security, I know tax planning, I know retirement income, but I don't know 529 plans. I don't do a lot of work with 529 plans or college planning. It doesn't mean that I don't know anything about it. I just don't specialize in that. The decisions someone is making at 65 are completely different than the decisions you're going to be making if you're 45.

So, to help with this topic and finding the right financial advisor, today I'm going to be joined by Lyndsey Monahan. She's a wealth manager with Precision Wealth Strategies based in Frisco, Texas. She focuses on the unique financial needs of professional women, women business owners, and most importantly, in my opinion, and maybe we can get into this a little bit, the unique financial needs of a blended family. So Lyndsey Monahan, welcome to the Simply Retirement Podcast.

Lyndsey Monahan: Thank you for having me, Eric. I'm excited to be here today.

Eric Blake: Awesome. I'm excited to have you here. I know you, and I have talked a lot about this over the last year and a half or so. We've had this conversation about different specialties and finding the right financial advisor. But before we get into too much of that, I just want you to share a little bit about your background. How did you become a financial advisor? Tell us a little about your story.

Lyndsey Monahan: Yeah, so I think it's well documented that anybody who becomes a financial advisor never really set out to be that person in life, right? So that's the same story here. In order to tell a complete story, I'm going to start, and it's going to sound like way back. But I was raised by a single mom, and so I was part of a blended family raised by a single mom. I always knew that money was a problem for my mom.

Eric Blake: I don't know what you're talking about.

Lyndsey Monahan: We openly discuss this now. So yes, my mom knows I'm disclosing all this on this podcast, right? But...

Eric Blake: I've done that to my mom, and she wasn't happy about it too.

Lyndsey Monahan: My mom was raising two daughters on a very limited income, so we were always told no because she couldn't afford it, not because she didn't want us to have it. It just kind of came out of that that I never wanted that for my family. I always wanted to do what I could to help her and help other women get through that. When I first set out in my career, financial advising was not even in the realm of possibility for me. I have an accounting and a computer science degree from Illinois State University.

I went to work for a big insurance company. I think most financial advisors also probably started out working for a wirehouse of some kind, right? I'm completely different in that matter as well. I went to work for a big insurance company and did property and casualty. I didn't do anything with financial services whatsoever. But what I learned there was that my coworkers were saving insane amounts of money and knew way more about money than I did. When I started, my salary was probably double what my mom made in an entire calendar year, so I knew that she couldn't really help me with personal finance. I started seeking out information from my peers and those around me. That's really how I started my journey in personal finance. Now, I'm going to fast forward pretty fast over the next couple of years, but while I was at State Farm, they offered me the ability to pursue my chartered financial consultant and chartered life insurance underwriter designations.

I wanted to do the CFP, but that was not something they allowed at the time. So I took the next best things, right? When I finally got to a point in my career where I was debating whether I wanted to stay in corporate America or transition into entrepreneurship, becoming a State Farm agent was the way that I chose to do that. So I was a State Farm agent for a short period of time. Then I went through a series of massive changes in my life. I had some personal trauma taking place. My father went through a divorce, followed by a stroke.

While he was going through a stroke, I was also going through a divorce. So just a lot of turmoil in my life at that time. I chose to walk away from my State Farm agency. I gave that up and followed a mentor and friend to New York Life and became a life insurance agent and a financial advisor there. I did have to have some securities licenses as a State Farm agent. We sold some mutual funds and that kind of thing there as well. But that's really what got me down this path of becoming a financial advisor slash planner, right?

I took that leap of faith and followed that friend. From there, I really fostered my career through New York Life and a couple of other experiences in the industry. Then I started my own firm and later this year joined forces with Precision Wealth Strategies. That's how I got where I am today.

Blended Family Dynamics

Eric Blake: Nice.

Lyndsey Monahan: I'm excited to be here on the show and talk about those experiences because I think the more we talk about these things, you kind of get to see where your advisor's heart is and where they came from, right?

Eric Blake: Well, and it's something that you and I have talked about. I just realized, as you were talking, our stories are even more similar than I realized simply because I was raised by a single mother. Then, my grandfather, who was my father figure—I never knew my biological father at all, period. But my grandfather was my father figure. He's the man I called daddy. He passed away when my grandmother was 62. I think that the story, and you and I've talked about this a lot, is tell your story.

Those are the people you realize you're most passionate about helping. I think that thinking about qualifications as a financial advisor, you know the CFP, the CHFC, those are just kind of the basics of what we need to be doing for our clients. But it really gets into how do you deal with the challenges of a specific group? For example, I would love to hear just the basics in your case.

Lyndsey Monahan: Exactly.

Eric Blake: When you talk about blended families, I've told you this: I think that's your story. Hopefully, I think you've started to, you may completely agree or you may still be having some questions. I don't know, but I've always felt like that's your best story. I can tell the passion behind it when you're talking about working with blended families. But what are some examples? Somebody's in a blended family, and they're looking to choose a financial advisor. What should they be looking for? Beyond the CHFC or CFP, there's more to it than that.

Lyndsey Monahan: Right. I don't care if somebody has those designations as long as they're qualified to talk about securities products with you or manage your personal finances. As long as there's somebody qualified and credentialed in the industry, that's all that matters. Blended families: I love working with blended families because I come from a blended family myself. What I mean by that is my parents were divorced when I was under 12. My dad got remarried right away, and I inherited three step-siblings right away. Then my mom got remarried, and I inherited four step-siblings on that side. So yeah, I was part of a very big family of kids, and we were all blended together. Some of those experiences were really good, and some were not. I think that's one of the most important things about working with blended families. Is that the dynamics of blended families are very wide and dynamic. They're very interesting.

Eric Blake: I guess.

Lyndsey Monahan: You have to have an advisor that understands that not all the time are those things hunky-dory. Like a lot of times, there's some ick involved in those things. It's important ick; it's so important to talk about those things because you don't want to ever make somebody feel like you're judging them. I am always saying that to my clients. Tell me your stuff because I got to know the stuff to help you in the right way.

Eric Blake: That's a good word.

Lyndsey Monahan: Fast forward in my life, I am now part of a blended family as well. I have a 17-year-old bonus son along with my husband Byron and my three-year-old daughter Stella. We have a yours and ours together, and it's amazing. I think a lot of that has to do with my experience growing up in a blended family and our desire to make sure that we have a cohesive approach to parenting and dealing with our blended families.

Common Mistakes in Financial Planning

Eric Blake: What are some of the mistakes that you've seen blended families make? Especially, it happens throughout the relationship in many cases, right? At the beginning and later down the road, there are things that have to be done. What are some of the mistakes that you've seen throughout your career?

Lyndsey Monahan: One of the biggest ones that I see is when you are titling an account together, or you're settling assets together, and you use joint tenants with rights of survivorship. That's the biggest mistake that I see. It's not always a mistake, but you have to make sure that you're making deliberate choices with it. So Eric, I'm going to make us sound like we're cheating on our spouses here today, but if you and I are married, right? You and I are married and...

Eric has children that he's bringing to this marriage, and I have children that I'm bringing to this marriage. If we have an account set up as joint tenants with rights of survivorship and Eric passes, I now have the ability to disinherit his children from any account that was jointly ours together under that designation. That's a problem, right? Or it could be a problem depending on, you know, if I run off and marry Ryan Reynolds, and I don't want to give any money to your children. I now have the ability to do that.

Eric Blake: Right. Why do we always knock the guy off first? I always did that, too. I always knocked the guy off first. It's just easier that way, I guess.

Lyndsey Monahan: And vice versa.

They gotta go first in a lot of things, so why not go first in that, too?

Eric Blake: Statistically, that's the way it is. So I guess it's just easier.

Lyndsey Monahan: Exactly. But I think having a discussion about that is really important because you want to make sure that you know what your spouse's plans are if something were to happen to you first, right? And how they're going to treat your children and making sure that that's spelled out properly in your will and that your beneficiaries are aligned the same way is so important.

Eric Blake: Well, let's touch on that one because it's one of those things as you and I are in Texas, and it's such an eye-opener, and you can jump true. You can share an insight on this as well. But the big one about owning a house is when there is a family where there are children from different past relationships, without a will, what happens with the house when you don't have a will but you have children from previous relationships and previous marriages, and one spouse passes.

Lyndsey Monahan: Yes.

It becomes really messy.

Eric Blake: And the man passes. I'll knock myself off again, I guess.

Lyndsey Monahan: Yeah, so the house goes to the spouse. The issue there is how is it set up? Is it passing per stirpes? Or have you designated the percentage or named an heir on that property? It matters in the state of Texas and other places because we always want to assume it goes to the spouse, but that's not always the case, as you very well know.

Eric Blake: If you don't have a will, then the other half actually goes to the other children. So now you end up owning one spouse who owns half the house, and the children own the other half. That's always a fun situation.

Lyndsey Monahan: That's right.

Eric Blake: So, getting back into more of how do we choose a financial advisor? How do we choose the right financial advisor for your situation? For our firm, we have what we call our Simply Retirement Roadmap Process. It's six specific steps that we take each prospective client through. It's really to help them make an educated and informed decision about our firm. How important is it, do you believe, to have a specific and, more importantly, an identifiable process so that people are wanting to engage you as their advisor?

How do they know what happens? What's step one? What's step two? How important do you feel like that is?

Lyndsey Monahan: I think that is critically important when you're working with a firm. We have our own process here at Precision Wealth Strategies as well. But the most important part of that conversation, I think that's kind of where you're going, is that initial conversation with an advisor. You want to make sure that it's an interview that goes both ways. I'm interviewing the client because I want to make sure that you're a good fit for working with me and the firm. But I also want you to be doing the same type of evaluation to know whether or not it's a good fit for you to work with me or for you to work with my firm. We all need to have a process outlined. Otherwise, how do you know where you're going when you're working with someone? You need to see that roadmap. I oftentimes draw parallels. I think it's probably from my PNC background, but I always want to know what that roadmap looks like. Where are we going? How do we get from where we are now to where we're going in the future? Having that plan of action is important.

Empowering Women

Eric Blake: I think that's one of the things that people are often intimidated by, or they feel like they don't know what it's like to work with a financial advisor. I think if you go into it with fewer unknowns, you're going to be better off, and the more educated you feel like you can be. I think that's where, for you and I, having that defined process of here's what happens, here's so that you know. Especially when we're working with women.

Unfortunately, I got messaged recently about a—it's actually a friend of a friend who said, "Hey, I have a friend whose husband recently passed away less than about a month ago, and she's needing help. She doesn't really know who to turn to." Again, this is a story I'm sure you've heard. He handled all the finances, and he's the first to go, which is always why we use that example, right? Why the husband passes away first? They wanted to find out if we help with just retirement planning or if we do financial planning. What do we do? That's a big question people have.

So Lyndsey, from your perspective, how can financial advisors do a better job of alleviating some of the worries and concerns that many people have? Specifically, since you and I primarily work with women, how can we do a better job of alleviating some of those worries and concerns that women have, even just reaching out to a financial advisor to ask for guidance or help?

Lyndsey Monahan: It starts with conversations like this, letting people know that we're real humans. We're not always the person in the stuffy suit or the person who is super intimidating. Eric, I think you're the anti-finance bro just so you know. I always think that you're approachable, so I just want you to know that. But I think it starts with being authentic.

Eric Blake: Thank you. Happy.

Lyndsey Monahan: Knowing that the person you're talking to is an authentic human being and that you hear their story. They should be willing to share their story with you. But then, outside of that, being willing to ask the questions that are uncomfortable to ask. If I have my spouse doing all the finances and I'm uncertain about it, I would want to encourage, I would hope that somebody would encourage me to ask the questions while we're at the table with an advisor.

Or reach out privately to ask those questions. One of the things that I always do with my clients, that I'm sure you probably also do, is I make sure that they both know when I'm dealing with a couple that they have access to me at any time to ask any question. You don't have to include each other in those conversations, but I will always ask, is this something that we can bring back and talk to each other about? Because it's so important.

I'm constantly having those conversations in rooms with women that you need to know what your plan is. I think a lot of financial advisors, especially those of us that work with women, are always trying to make sure that both parties are engaged in the conversation. We want to make sure that you know without a shadow of a doubt what's going to happen. If you don't know or you're unsure when that time comes, pick up the phone and call me. You should have me on speed dial. I'm here for you to help in that capacity.

Eric Blake: Well, that's something I recently added to our website. That's a question I know you get because I've referred people to you. You'll have somebody ask, do you work with couples? On both of our websites, it's very specifically focused on women. In my case, it's women over 55 retirement planning. For you, it's business owners, entrepreneurs, and executives. You'll get that question: do you work with couples? The way I explain it is, yes, we do.

But it is imperative that both spouses be actively involved in the planning process. It can't just be one or the other. It can't be just the wife, it can't be just the husband. It has to be both. I really stress that in every conversation if it is a couple, you both have to be involved.

Lyndsey Monahan: Absolutely.

I feel the same way about that. I'm really careful when I say about my marketing. I market a lot to women. The reason for that is I want them to know that I am approachable for them. It's not that I'm not trying to have men as clients. I want women to know that I'm approachable and here to help them as well. I think so much of the financial industry perception is that the financial industry markets strongly to men, which there's nothing wrong with saying that. But I think the more we see people out there in the industry, women, especially female advisors, talking about how to be more inclusive and make sure that women feel comfortable sitting at these tables and asking the questions, the better that can be. So yes, I totally work with couples. I work with single men all the time. There's nothing wrong with them coming to me in those cases. I love to work with anybody, but I want to make sure it's a right fit. Like I said, I focus on women because of my story.

Industry Challenges

Eric Blake: That's unfortunately a lot of where our industry has dropped the ball. Historically, our industry is older white guys in their fifties and sixties. Well, I'm approaching that as we speak, but I'm trying to delay it as long as possible. That's the way it's been. That statistic still blows my mind, even now that I think about it. Depending on what you're reading or listening to, it's somewhere between 70 to 80% of women.

Lyndsey Monahan: Thank you.

Eric Blake: will change advisors within the first year of losing their spouse, whether it's because of divorce or widowhood because they didn't have a relationship. Just like you said, they're not—they never—and I put a lot of this on the financial advisors, to be honest. They never reached out or the wife can just be sitting there. I've heard these stories over and over again. The wife can be sitting there with the husband, and the financial advisor only talks to the husband. It's just like they're not even there. They might as well just go grab a cup of coffee, go to Starbucks, and just hang out or go be with your friends if that's all you're going to get.

Lyndsey Monahan: Yes.

I hear that story all the time. I've had it happen to myself, too, not in the financial realm, obviously, because I'm in it, but we've had a pool company come out and give us an estimate, and the salesman spoke only to my husband. But I'm the one making the decision, not him. I think when advisors get into that track, you know, in the first conversation with an advisor, if that's how they're going to treat you or not, they're not going to change the deeper you get into those conversations.

Eric Blake: But that's why they change.

Let's talk about that. What do you think are some of the red flags? Either in the initial conversation or when you get to that first meeting, what are some of the red flags you think potential clients or people seeking financial advice should look for that might say this may not be the right fit or this person doesn't know me or they don't know my situation?

Lyndsey Monahan: First and foremost, how did your spouse or significant other or you meet this advisor? I think it starts that early in the conversation. If your spouse—I'm going to assume that we're talking about a woman—and your spouse has met an advisor out and about, and they've had conversations before you were brought to the table, that is a red flag in my book because most advisors I know who try to cater toward helping women or making sure that women are included in the conversation won't have an in-depth conversation about potentially working together with a family unless both parties are at the table. I think that is an immediate red flag for me. Is that advisor trying to get you both at the table to have the conversation? And then when you're at the table, how are they including you in the conversation?

Are they speaking directly to you? Are they looking at you? Are they looking you in the eye and asking you questions, too? Are they pausing to make sure that you both have an opportunity to answer a question? Those are all major red flags. When I think of anybody interviewing an advisor, I would say those would be some critical things right at the beginning. I'm sure you probably have others, too, right? Other red flags.

Important Questions to Ask

Eric Blake: Well, yeah. I think the biggest thing, and maybe that's where we can go next, is thinking about what are some questions. Do you have, I mean, two, three, four questions, whatever you think would be fitting of, hey, what are some questions they should be asking to get a better feel for how that advisor works or whether they may be a good fit?

Lyndsey Monahan: Yeah, I think one of the most important questions for a woman to ask is how often do you get into conversations with women about their concerns with personal finance in the long term? The reason I say that is most women, at least in my experience, are concerned about outliving their money or having to have somebody else take care of them and being able to pay for that. It's all about long-term financial stability and having those long-term financial concerns taken care of. When we think about things like long-term care, I want to stay living in my house as long as possible, all those types of things. How is that advisor working with their clients currently to address the longer-term financial concerns of women? So all of my questions are centered around that, right? Most women come to me, and they want to know questions about long-term care, life insurance. They have more questions along the security lines of things when it comes to longevity. Because, as you said, we outlive men most of the time. Those are the concerns that women have. It's well documented in the financial industry that women have different financial concerns. So, asking questions that directly hit on those things is important.

Eric Blake: I actually did episode six, which was specifically what questions, 10 questions to ask your financial advisor if you are preparing for retirement. Understanding how closely did they pay attention to tax law changes? How familiar are they with all the different distribution rules and distribution guidelines when it comes to IRAs and inherited IRAs and all these different types of things? I shared that in episode six, but I'm sure there are going to be some similar questions that you probably could share. So, for blended families, what are one or two questions, again, that if somebody's in a blended family and they're looking for an advisor, what could they ask to make sure that advisor understands what they're dealing with, what the challenges are that they will be facing?

Lyndsey Monahan: So first and foremost, asking the question straight out in front, how many blended families have you worked with, or do you have experience working with blended families? And can you give me some examples? Asking for the story, not specifics, but asking for the story so that you can hear the advisor articulate to you how they've helped such and such blended family. Other questions would be: what are some of the concerns that your blended family clients have, and how are you addressing those?

Eric Blake: That's great.

Great question.

Lyndsey Monahan: Getting straight into the okay, we have a blended family. You say you can help us. What are you doing to help facilitate those discussions? I know you have these discussions as well, too, but are you prepared to bring in our family and help us have those discussions as a blended family unit? Those are critically important because you want to make sure not that they know your business but that they know what the plan is.

Eric Blake: Anything else specifically that you know, something that I didn't ask any questions you feel like are issues you think we ought to talk about, or maybe that, again, that I overlooked that you feel like would help women as they're evaluating financial advisors, anything else you want to add to our conversation?

Advisor Roles

Lyndsey Monahan: Yeah, so I don't think you've overlooked anything. I think one thing I would want to make sure that we talk about, too: is your advisor prepared to sit at the table with your CPA and your estate planning attorney? Especially in blended family situations, making sure that the estate planning attorney is part of the conversation and that there's open dialogue back and forth between your advisor and them. That's probably one of the other big things that I've had to work through with clients is a lot of times,

advisors aren't versed in how to engage an estate planning attorney or how to engage the CPA in those discussions, especially with business owners, succession planning, and then also just blended families and estate planning. Those are big topics that we know a lot about because we've had to have dialogue with them throughout our careers. At the same time,

I can't draft one of those plans. You can't draft one of those plans. We're not attorneys. Having the right type of professional at the table and making sure that your advisor is helping quarterback those things. I don't like to use the quarterback analogy, but quarterbacking those things or being your financial counsel and pulling those parties together.

Eric Blake: Because you don't like football, we're in cowboy land.

Lyndsey Monahan: No, it's just cowboy land, so everything revolves around the quarterbacks around here, right?

Eric Blake: Yeah, source subject. That's right. We'll stay away from that. But the analogy does typically work well, though. Yeah. I think that's important. A lot of times, people will come to us not knowing, especially if they haven't been involved in the planning process, they'll want to know who else can you help me, who can you connect me with to help me get my estate plan done and help me get my taxes done or whatever that need is. I've always viewed,

Lyndsey Monahan: I know, right?

Eric Blake: We've been in a couple of different networking groups together, and I've always viewed networking from our perspective. It's not can I get referrals from this networking group? It's who within this group can be a resource for my client regardless of what it is, whether it has a dollar sign attached to it or not. How can I make sure my clients are taken care of through these other connections with other professionals?

Lyndsey Monahan: Absolutely. Speaking of those networking groups, we've been in a couple where it's solely focused on blended family units. We've talked to professionals who specialize in helping the family dog get through those. It was actually. But I think that's important. With the onset of social media and how we can use,

Eric Blake: Right. Yeah, that was awesome. That was a great presentation, actually. What happens to the dog after divorce? Nobody thinks about the dog.

Lyndsey Monahan: networking and social media to help us grow as professionals speaks to everything as well. But I've come across someone who helps write parenting plans, unique parenting plans to fit specific needs. Those things are important, especially when we're dealing with blended families and the concerns that we have long-term with them.

Conclusion

Eric Blake: Yes. Well, this has been awesome, Lyndsey. I would love for you to share how people can connect with you. Where's the best place to reach you? Whether it's on social media or your website, whatever you'd like to share, we'll make sure we include that in the show notes.

Lyndsey Monahan: Please reach out to me via LinkedIn or you can go directly to our website, which is www.precisionwealthstrategies.com.

Eric Blake: Awesome. Lyndsey, thank you so much for joining us today. If you're a female business owner or an executive or, more specifically, looking for financial guidance as a blended family, please be sure to reach out to Lyndsey. 

In our case, you can go to www.blakewealthmanagement.com. Just click that start here button. That's where you can review that six-step process I referred to earlier, the Simply Retirement Roadmap Process.

Also, before we wrap up today's episode, I want to share just some other great resources. If you are looking for a financial advisor or a financial planner,

I will also put this in the show notes, but if you are looking for a certified financial planner, a CFP, you can go to www.letsmakeaplan.org or plannersearch.org. 

If you're specifically looking for an advisor that focuses on women and women's issues, you can visit stronghermoney.com. There's also a site that both Lyndsey and I are familiar with, www.pursestrings.co. It is .CO not .COM. It is pursestrings.co.

You can find other professionals on that site, attorneys, CPAs that focus on women and, again, women's issues. I actually had the co-founders of Per Strings, Dr. Barb Provost, and her daughter Maggie Nielsen on episode 17, if you'd like to take a listen to that. 

If you expect or think you're going to be going to divorce or maybe you've gone through a divorce recently, you can also check out thedivorcedtransitionprofessionals.com.

That's where you can find financial advisors and other professionals that are experienced in the divorce world. Lastly, there are also many great volunteer organizations, but these are just two that I'm involved with. If you're in a financial situation where you're not sure you have the resources, you still need access to financial advice. There's an organization www.savvyladies.org, S-A-V-V-Y ladies.org, that allows you to get financial guidance and coaching from volunteer professionals. 

One that I've just become involved in that I'm excited about. If you're a widow or even a widower and you need financial guidance or coaching, you can go to www.wingsforwidows.com to get free financial coaching from a certified financial planner.

 So, as always, please like, follow, and share this show. 

We will see you again on the next episode of the Simply Retirement Podcast. 

In the meantime, please remember, that retirement is not the end of the road. It is the start of a new journey.

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